Happy New Year, gorgeous!
As I’m typing this on my laptop, I can’t help but think about everything that’s happened since I moved to London. What a rollercoaster it has been!
2015 was the year I took the leap. I left Italy on a warm and sunny May day and, by the end of that year, I was paying my bills doing what I loved, had met the love of my life and was making the most of what my new city had to offer. The world was my oyster, full of exciting possibilities. I felt invincible, like I could do anything.
2016 was the worst year of my life. For love, I moved into a crappy place that was too far from everything. I started turning down invitations because I was too scared to walk alone after dark. I felt like I was living in a prison.
Work was thriving but I realised the projects I had taken on weren’t aligned with my true passions and values. On the one hand, I was so grateful for being able to make a living writing. On the other, the kind of writing I was doing wasn’t fulfilling me nor helping people. I hadn’t made it this far just to end up promoting ok products no one needed or wanted.
The worst came in September. I was waiting for the tube when I got the phone call. “Dad’s dead, Giorgia,” my sister was sobbing on the other side of the phone. I don’t remember ever feeling so much pain in my life. I spent the rest of the year trying to numb the pain by working too much. There are worse ways to numb the pain, I guess. Still, not something I recommend.
2017 was the year I tried to fix this mess. I spent the first six months in denial, just working my ass off. Then, I had a breakdown. I knew I had to make a change or I’d go crazy. So, Adam and I moved to much nicer area, filled with green parks, nice restaurants and closer to the city centre.
I quit the freelancing gigs that were making me so unhappy and decided to concentrate on the projects that really mattered to me, like this website. I thought my finances would take a big hit but I’m making more money than ever. It’s incredible what happens when you let go of your fears and focus on what truly makes you happy.
I don’t think I will ever get over my father’s death but I’m dealing with it properly now. I still have a little cry every now and then and I will always miss him like crazy but I’m coming to terms with the fact he’s in a better place now and I’m sure I will see him again one day.
The year was supposed to end on a roll. And yet, I still get that nagging voice in my head telling me something is off. Now that I’ve ticked off the boxes on my biggest dreams – moving to London and make a living doing the writing I like – I feel like it’s time to move on. Chase new dreams. Grab new opportunities. Move out of London, maybe.
2018 is still a blur. I have a rough idea of where I want to go but no idea how to get there. But then, that’s exactly how I felt when I jumped on that plane back in May 2015. There are have been bumps along the way but things have turned out well.
If there’s one lesson I’ve learned is to be more intentional. Don’t say yes to the first work opportunity you receive because you’re afraid there aren’t gonna be others. Don’t take the first flat the estate agent shows you because you’re afraid the place you really want to live in is out of your budget so what’s the point? Don’t hang out with people who are dragging you down with them because you’re afraid to make new friends.
Figure out what you want. Visualise it in your mind. Every little detail. You don’t have to know how to get there. Just take one step at a time. No shortcuts.
The new year is a clean slate. Write your best story on it.